How Do You End A Toxic Friendship?
When friendships are not balanced and there is no reciprocity between the parties involved, it is better to put an end to it. We will tell you how to do it in the best possible way.
At some point in our lives, we’ll need to end a toxic friendship, which isn’t always easy. However, when we realize that some relationships are no longer good for our well-being, it is best to accept it and walk away.
Often we resist ourselves and avoid ending negative friendships. Unconsciously, we sometimes get close to the wrong people. In this article, we will see how we should go about moving away from those who do not offer us a good friendship.
Characteristics of a toxic friendship
We will first take a look at a list of the main characteristics of a toxic friendship. The idea is that you are able to recognize these behaviors in your daily life.
This way, you will be able to differentiate between friendships that are worth keeping and those that are not. Let’s go.
1. They are there without being
The physical presence of a person does not necessarily imply a company. Sometimes when we meet up with a group of friends we can feel very lonely.
Toxic friends don’t care about your opinions or your worries – they just want you to be with them and accept everything without asking questions.
2. They focus on your flaws in a contemptuous way
Friends help us see which aspects of ourselves we need to improve, but negative friendships will focus on our shortcomings in an unconstructive way. Therefore, we will feel bad and they will not provide any solution.
3. You will feel like questioned
Some people tend to question the behavior of others based on their personal criteria, which is not the mark of great empathy. A true friend will not judge your decisions: he will understand them and give his opinion on it.
4. They will avoid leaving you an important place
There are friends who require constant attention and when for some reason that attention ends up on us, they cannot tolerate it. People who don’t allow us to have projections can’t be our friends; at least not in a good way.
5. Lack of consistency
Toxic friends are inconsistent with their speech and tend to contradict each other with their actions. For example, those people who say they support us in our plans but, at the same time, avoid getting involved in them.
This does not mean that all of our friends should be part of our personal projects. However, when there is no consistency between speech and actions, the situation is confused. Ideally, a friend can be honest and speak out clearly when they don’t want to be part of a plan.
Tips and Ways to End a Toxic Friendship
Now that we’ve seen the most common indicators of friendships that aren’t doing anything positive, it’s time to take a look at some effective ways to put them aside, without getting too complicated.
1. Learn to set limits
To put aside a friendship that isn’t worth it, it’s important to know those things that we’re unwilling to negotiate. So when we are able to stand firm in the face of our ideals and principles, we can understand that it is best to move away from those who do not meet the same standard.
2. Express yourself assertively
Assertive communication is an important resource for stepping away from bad friendships. When we can clearly communicate our decisions, we feel more at ease. It is about not repressing this need to move away.
Speaking assertively also involves putting yourself in the other person’s shoes and understanding that they may not agree with this decision to walk away. Nevertheless, we must remain firm and follow this idea. We will need to be brief, concise and respectful when explaining our reasons.
3. Talk to someone else before you distance yourself
Before chatting with that friend you want to get away from, it might be a good idea to talk to someone else first. The goal is to prevent emotions from getting out of hand during the conversation and everything ending up in conflict.
4. Visualize the moment of the conversation
Visualization is about creating probable scenarios in our mind, similar to those that might occur during conversation. This way we will be less exposed to surprising situations.
5. Respect the other person’s opinions
As we mentioned, it is likely that the other person will not agree with the decision we have made. However, we need to be firm in our way of doing things.
This does not mean that we should force others to think like us. It is important to accept the other’s point of view.
Can a toxic friendship stop being toxic?
It will not always be necessary to distance yourself from people; sometimes relationships improve. A toxic friendship might cease to be if the parties involved succeed in respecting each other.
It is not necessary to always agree with your friends, but it is necessary to accept differences, as much as possible.
